Monday, August 11, 2003


Suffered from insomnia all last week, particularly Friday evening after being wakened by one of my black cats attacking the other. I got up, started reading the news, and became obsessed with the whole Bertrand Cantat murder scandal in Lithuania. I’ve become a huge fan of Noir Desir in the past couple of years even though I don’t speak any French. (I know what their songs are about from several articles published in the Polish press and translations of their lyrics.) I even went to their concert in Warsaw last year. Now he’s been charged with murder. It’s almost unfortunate his suicide attempt was unsuccessful. At least I will still be able to sing, “I’m lost but I’m not stranded.” The gravity of his situation makes me dizzy.

Speaking of the gravity of rock stars, Stephen and I went to the Pat Benatar concert at Billy Bob’s in Fort Worth Saturday night. I always know she’s going to sing “Hell is for Children” because, as she says, she sings it at every concert. But as someone who was abused as a child, I don’t much care to hear this song while I’m out enjoying live music, particularly after years of dealing with and getting beyond that abuse. At what point does a political/artistic statement become exploitation of those the artist seeks to aid? If you know the answer, please get back to me.

So much work to do this week, from writing my syllabus to composing more music under deadline and preparing for the radio show. Looking forward to the payoff. And now my chores beckon.

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